Today in Gym class, after an embarrassing warm up of strange jogs including high knee jogs and “butt kicker jogs,” my gym teacher sat us down on the floor and told us that we’d soon be tested on how many push ups and sit ups we could do in two minutes. A chance to show publicly how little upper body strength I have? For two minutes? Whoo-hoo! Then. Then, he told us that right then and there, we were going to practice to see how many of each we could do in thirty seconds. Now, thirty seconds might not be two minutes, but it’s still REALLY long. Especially if you suck at both push ups and sit ups and don’t exercise at all because exercising is tacky.
The gym teacher put us into pairs…. of two. We were supposed to count how many of each our partners did in thirty seconds and then switch. To my horror, my partner was actually quite good at push ups. She got about twenty six in the thirty seconds. I tried not to act too freaked out when it was my turn to do the push ups. I put my “I know I have no upper body strength and I’m a skinny little white boy, but I’m going to make the best of it” look on my face and started pushing up. At first it wasn’t so bad. At least for the first two or three. Then it got hard. By about ten, my arms were shaking horribly each time I attempted to bring myself back up. When it was over, after nineteen horrible pushups, I did my little “I know that I look like a total idiot doing pushups, but I’m going to make the best of it and laugh it off” laugh to make it seem like I was one hundred percent okay with looking like a total idiot while doing pushups.
Then it was time to do the sit ups. And once again, I watched with complete terror at my partner’s ease with them. And once again, I was absolutely horrible. I think I got up to ten. When it was over, my whole upper body was aching horribly. And I still have a WHOLE TWO MINUTES of this to look forward to!
8 Comments
Don’t fret. I still can’t do either properly.
Push ups make me want run away and hide for the rest of the day. Ech. I swear your gym teacher must be evil.
exercising is tacky? (note correct spelling) fuck that. howabout, its good for you? stop saying tacky. ive been telling you this for four years.
I corrected the spelling error. And I was trying to be a little facetious. Why don’t people get this?
i am rubin, god of all things better than everyone else! look at me in my self worth! you are below me! ahh!
Aaron, please note that when you are reading this, that I did not write the above comment. Somebody else did. But I’m not supposed to tell you who. Because then you’d be mad at them.
lol, I’m so happy I finished PE my Sophmore year. You could always just do what I do, decline to put yourself through a meaningless activity that does nothing but give people a chance to show non-existant skill in a field that will in no way further their chances of getting into college or helping them excell in later life. Of course when I said that to coach Beck, I got called a stuck up rebel without a cause, I got detention and I still had to do the push-ups… maybe I shouldn’t be giving advice
Niener neiner neiner! I dont have gym ever again in my life. Ah… I am free to fatten up on pizza and other deliverable food. Mmm.
I’d suggest you practice a little. It doesn’t really matter in the long run if you do well or not, but Im just saying it might be fun. :-D
skinny little white boys unite!